Wooo Blog

Nothing to see here, move along.

Censorship, It's a Bitch

See above.

*yawn*

That is all.

Apologies

Sorry for the lack of entries for the past month. I just haven't had anything to write about I guess. I'd say "stay tuned," but I honestly don't care if anyone reads this anyway, so do whatever.

Almost Done, But

The semester is almost over and I am completely burnt out. It's not even because of the large amount of studying that I've been doing lately. I'm not apathetic about my grades--I want to study hard to learn this material and perform well on my last final. I don't know what it is. I think it's best described as a general lack of focus because I have no idea what is most important to me or what should be most important to me. In the past, that priority was always clear: do well in school, get into college, find a major that I enjoy, succeed in those studies, and so on. I had never experienced this confusion until the past year of my life and it has only intensified over that time. It's as if I'm completely lost, but not because I don't know how to get to where I want to be. I simply don't know where I want to be.

When I was younger, unlike many of my peers, I was never able to envision my future adult-self in the "real world." I had a strong drive to succeed because I wanted to be able to do anything. Well now I am an adult, but I have yet to gain some greater foresight. How far can the old motivation take me? How far should I let it?

At the end of the day, all I have are a bunch of vague notions about different things that I think would make me happy now or in the future. Unfotunately, none of these notions can be combined to point me in any one direction. Even worse, the few times that I've actually been content with or optimistic about my current direction in life, the underlying reasons for that optimism have been snatched away by (seemingly) outside circumstances. How does somone with no experience in making difficult decisions filter through everything in order to act based on some obscure set of priorities?

It's probably not healthy to engage in this type of deliberation during finals week, but I can't help it. These questions have been in the back of my mind for months and particularly in recent weeks, and they aren't going away anytime soon.

Getting through a Ph.D. Program

Who am I to answer this question? It's not like I'm even remotely close to having a Ph.D., but still, I've done a lot of thinking on this topic over the past two years (which is hopefully a sensible thing to have done). What exactly does it take to get through a Ph.D. program? I'm not talking about things like intelligence or innate creativity or anything like that. I'm talking more about one's general (and current) attitude towards everything. I am able to condense it into two main "prerequisites" that seem essential:

1) You have to find your niche in the field. You have to truly enjoy (or somehow convince yourself that you truly enjoy) what you have chosen to study. This is somewhat obvious, but worth pointing out nonetheless.

2) You have to not mind being tied down for several (i.e. 5 to 7) years. This one is the kicker. In my experience, there are two different types of students who seem to have this trait. Type 1's are those who don't care about anything besides their work. These types are very common, in my experience. Type 2's are those who have entirely fulfilling personal lives. This is a broad concept, but it is common among those who have stable families or loved-ones nearby. Also included in this characterization are those who are more free-spirited--people who excel at living life one day or one week at a time.

These two attributes are essential to the Ph.D. student. Contrary to what some want others to believe, intelligence and creativity are not the most important factors. Most crucially, the student must simply be a highly motivated individual. To me, these two conditions are necessary components of possessing such motivation.

In self-reflection, the prospective Ph.D. student must ask himself or herself, "Am I at a point in my life where I know (with certainty) that I have both of these traits? Is this what I truly want to be doing, right now?"

Sorry

For the lack of posts. I've been busy, unmotivated and generally blah. I'll be back when I'm back.